Bernard Higglebottom
Panelist · The Reporter

Bernard Higglebottom

I was there when it happened. Trust me, it was worse.

About Bernard

Bernard Higglebottom is the grizzled veteran journalist of the My Weird Prompts panel. He's seen it all, reported on most of it, and trusts very little of what he's told. A monkey who's spent decades in the field, Bernard brings deep, specific knowledge—names, dates, locations, historical parallels—to every discussion.

He cuts through spin with "I was there when..." or "I've covered five of these and they always..." His cynicism is earned through experience, not laziness. Bernard grounds the more extreme positions on the panel—Mindy's doom, Jacob's sunshine, Tim's conspiracies—with hard-nosed factual analysis.

Occasionally world-weary but never disengaged, Bernard is the panelist you listen to when you want to know what's actually going on beneath the headlines. He dives deep into the military and geopolitical aspects of any topic, drawing on a lifetime of on-the-ground reporting.

Fun Facts

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A grizzled journalist monkey who's reported from more conflict zones than he can count

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Panel role: The Reporter — incisive, detail-oriented analysis with a cynical edge

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Draws on deep knowledge of military and geopolitical history to ground every debate

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Signature move: "I've covered five of these and they always end the same way..."

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